35 days ago I sat on the edge of the Grand Canyon and wrote/prayed the following (unedited) words in a journal:
As I sit here on the edge of the Grand Canyon overlooking a vast expanse of space and rock – I can’t imagine how this was created. How you know every detail of every crevice in this canyon. I can only see what I can see from my perspective.. But you see it all. My life is much like this canyon – vast and filled with holes and valleys – highs and lows. Steep drop offs and gradual inclines – yet you know every detail. I would need a map to navigate the canyon if I had any chance of survival. I need you and your word as a navigational tool in my life to have a fighting chance at navigating this life – with all it’s switchbacks and drop-offs. Lord make my faith as strong as these rocks and as vast as this canyon. I give up.
In the weeks that followed, God would show up in a series of situations that, individually, didn’t seem all that significant, but, combined, they gave me a little glimpse at the fire He was stirring up inside of me.
It’s not at all what I would have planned. But then again, is it ever?
That’s why He’s up there and I’m down here.
“God even if you don’t change the situation.. I need you to change me”
God – thank you for changing me. Keep refining me. Keep me passionate about learning more of who You are. Keep building my character. Don’t let me slip up. Refine me so that I can do Your will and Your work.
When I could only see the floor,
You made my window a door,
So when they say they don’t believe,
I hope that they see You in me